Recently in Stepmother Category

I felt so awefull when J. was looking at Gracie who had to try on her school clothes. She would look at the dresses and skirts and say, "I wish my mom would buy those kinds of things for me." Repeatedly those comments dug into me. I know she will not get such things left to her mother to provide them. I get the impression her mom detests girlish things and discourages feminine behavior, which Steve has said I am right on in my thinking. Girl things, especially dolls and dresses and pink have always recieved sarcasm and snide remarks to the point J. often expressed upon first meeting she was a tomboy and even as late as recently made comments about wanting to be a boy. Hell, she gave Steve a book last Christmas about how to talk to and raise a daughter ... it was a piece of shit little book that answered q's on puberty and such, and the comment was "I don't know how to raise a girl." Stupid cow, she is supposed to be a grown woman and can't figure out how to raise her daughter. Blows my mind and makes her intelligence highly questionable. Anywho ... I took back a pair of shoes for myself and got the very last pair of clogs for J. based on the morning comment, "At first I did not like the shoes you got yesterday but I really like them, they are cool and very comfy." The comments on the dresses got to me too. I went back and got her one of the plaid drop waist dresses she admired, with the knowledge the clothes were to be worn to school but returned here and not considered part of her wardrobe at her mom's. If we buy school clothes, it will become expected and her mother will not spend the child support on J., she will find other uses for it. Yes, it happens, we have seen it. J. rarely comes back with anything when they go shopping. It pisses me off and Steven too, sometimes I think some ppl should be accountable for the child-support and how it is spent. I have only see 2 outfits in a year that her mom bought new. We have school pics of J. in the exact same clothes from the year before and you can see the wear and age in them ... Grrrr... I should shut up.

I started stripping the dining room chairs yesterday. It wasn't the huge job I thought it would be. The shellac on the old chairs came up quick and easy. The color of the natural wood came up light. I decided once the chair was dry after cleaning everything with mineral spirits to test the color of the stain I wanted to use. Ummmm ... after 10 minutes the color change was minimal. Tried again, same thing. I bought the stain at Ace Hardware. I am presuming it is the stain. We went to Lowe's after supper and I picked the Olympic brand in a red mahogany color. I'll try it today. While at Lowe's we spent far too much money. :-s I got 2 new lamps and shades for the livingroom. We got a new toilet seat for the kids bathroom, fire extinguishers for the kitchen and downstairs, pulls for the ceiling fans in the kitchen and livingroom. One thing I was very glad. Steve rarely buys anything for himself. He bought himself a leatherman tool and a pocket knife. He picked up one for his Dad, too. It is a smooth action tool that really feels good in your hand. J. went to her Mom's for the weekend. Earlier in the day we were informed that we are boring. :-s I told Steve what she said, he took it hard. Sometimes I wonder if I should keep my mouth shut, but I know it is right to tell him things that happen in the days when he isn't around. I am really worried about the future of things. Her Mom's wiccan wedding ceremony is coming up soon and I can only imagine the impression it will have on her considering her grandmother is the 'priestess' performing the ceremony. She has no understanding of what is going on clearly in that lifestyle and that is good in some ways and decveptive in others. Diannic Wicca has far more too it that most see. She thought her grandmother was a Nun. :-s Steve was quick to disassociate his upbringing with the pagan rituals that will be performed soon. It really is a hard line to walk. We can't say anything that comes across too harsh or negative as it will put her on the defense of her Mom. All we can do is to imphasize the positiveness of the way we live and our belief in God. I pray that God protect and be with her.